Heya Dude, I feel your pain. When I first started in IT, I was doing Helpdesk for Cable modems, back in the days when they were brand new. Like less than 5000 people in Chicagoland that had it. I remember when 10000 people subscribed, the company went nutz. Big party, bonuses, was good times. Then the thing exploded, couldn't find qualified people in the field to be techs or customer support.
I sympathize with what you have been through, and for sure in this modern age of customer service, you shouldn't have been treated the way that your were. We had cases similar to yours when I worked in support. One that will I will never forget for as long as I live was a call i got for a guy that would lose his connection seemingly randomly, and frequently. He was working fine the first month or so when he got it, but things went south. Like once every hour and always only for a few minutes, his connection would drop. The problem persisted for months. Solutions offered varied based on who he talked to. Many trucks were rolled, one tech even told him to erase and re-install windows. When he got to my phone, i insisted he work only with me. We then attacked the problem methodically.
The guy was pleasant to deal with, but very frustrated (I am sure you can empathize). Making matters worse for me, he was on the village board of the town he was in. Cable was VERY political back them (probably still is) since a it was the town's council that chose what cable company was going to service the city since the technology at the time allow only one provider. (All of their accounts were flagged in our system so we knew to 'pucker up' when they called in)
I had senior network operations involved, senior field technicians, and even the manager of construction and new cable plant involved. They ran brand new lines from the plant, to his house, ran a new line in his house to the modem, fished it through is basement walls and everything. They tried new modems, even prototype ones, also bought a brand new out of the box laptop for testing, but the problem persisted. The climax came when everyone was over at his house trying to figure it out. You know what finally clued everyone in to the problem? He offered the people there something to drink. (You ready for this?)
After he was initially installed for service, he rearranged things in his basement. What did he put next to the wall where his cable line is run? His refrigerator. Like a 1970's refrigerator. Whenever the fridge turned on to cool, it created enough EMI that the cable signal dropped out, and his connection along with it. When he offered the guys drinks, the door was left opened, it turned on, and the connection dropped. Once they moved the fridge away from the wall that had his cable in it, the problem vanished.
We laughed about it after the fact. It was the running joke for about a year afterward as it lead to support techs asking 'Is your refrigerator running?' when someone called in with an intermittent connection problem. The reality is that had nobody been there to notice that, his problem wasn't gonna get fixed. All the department heads couldn't explain his problem, and were tired of rolling trucks. Subscriptions back then were like $25 a month and we probably spend $10000 in labor costs alone in troubleshooting it. If they hadn't solved it that night, our VP was on call to explain to him it was gonna be a 'take it or leave it' situation. Continue to pay for the service as it was, or disconnect it. The company didn't want to spend any more time on it.
It is actually because of this case that our region made policy for upgrading from RG-59 coax cable to RG-6 Mandatory for all cable modem installs. This created a lot of angry calls from people believe it or not. Lots of people wanted to use their existing wiring, which was in many cases already concealed and presentable rather than have the installer trudge another cable through their walls. (Techs rarely care about appearance). We also had cases where people moved the modem in their house to where another Coax outlet was and their connection wasn't as good. Lots of fun were those calls.
I think back to those days fondly but i would NEVER want to support public internet connections ever again. There are so many combinations of Modems, routers, switches and devices out there. Not to mention the different way to use them such as netflix, whole home connectivity appliances, or even multiroom TV on a single converter. Unless I was in their house and knew everything they were doing, there is no way I would be able to discover their 'running refrigerator'.
I told ya that story to illustrate that you might be in a similar situation. Not excusing your treatment at all by their managers and service reps, I want to believe that things truly do look 'OK' On their end. Nemasis had a great question about your neighbors experience. Oversaturation of clients for sure could be the issue, but your provider would know that if that was the case. And while they wouldn't never admit it, they would have focused more on apologizing rather than confronting you if that was the case. If your neighbors have issues at the same time, move evidence for the plight.
I know you said your service is disconnected at the moment, but in the interests of solving the problem (Which I am sure nobody wants right now more than you) I do have some tips if it gets turned back on.
The idea is to take as many of the variables out of the picture as you can while being consistent in your testing. To me, if I was your tech, I would want you to get as direct of a connection as you possible can to the modem itself. I don't know what hardware you have on your network, but you specifically mentioned that you get major latency when you bypass your router. To me that is a BIG indicator of a problem with one of those two components. Modem or computer.
The computer should be able to connect directly to the modem, without latency, without issues. If that can't be achieved without adding a router to the mix, that is a big red flag for me. The router may make it appear to go away, but likely it is masking it. The fact that you mentioned updating the routers firmware seems to have impacted the problem, again make me suspicious of something outside your provider directly.
The Best thing I can suggest to determine which one is having problems is of course trying a different computer plugged directly into the modem (you will need to power cycle the modem each time you switch computers out). If the second PC cannot connect without latency directly to the modem, my stink eye would be pointed at the modem. If it connects fine.. well now you are getting somewhere.
It could be the modem is malfunctioning or even that it doesn't 'get along' with your particular Network card in your PC. As silly as that sounds, you would be surprised how often that happens. If ya check out the 1GB Network cards at amazon.com, there are tons of em. All ranging from like $10 to like $300. Manufacturers you may not have ever known existed. I am not saying the most expensive is always the best, but if they are 1GBs cards, meaning top speed is all the same, what justifies the price difference?
Bus type, bus speed, Packet size, QoS support, buffer size, frame size, chipset, secondary support chips, all sorts of techno mumbo jumbo that guys WAY smarter than me can speak to as to how it all has improved over the years. The more expensive cards could have features and flexibility the the bargain basement cards don't. You could check for Firmware and driver updates for your NIC in your PC to see if that helps, or even a new card altogether. (I would borrow a PC from a friend before I threw money at this)
I know it's frustrating, and your provider is doing you no service in their treatment of you. And yea, if your area is over saturated, or they have plant issues at your house, none of the above is gonna matter. But as the saying goes, when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, no matter however improbable, must be the truth. So uhm......Is your refrigerator running?
Hang in there dude!
